TEN COMMANDMENTS OF BADFIC
1) Thou shalt never correctly spell any of the following: experiance, definately, grammer, seperate recieve, medival. If thou art unsure, thou shalt be certain to avoid thy dictionary at all costs, and thou shalt create the most outrageous spellings thou canst imagine. In addition, thou shalt always mix up the following: accept and except; affect and effect; their, they're, and there; whose and who's; you're and your; its and it's; then and than; two, too, and to.
2) Thou shalt realize that capital letters were made expressly to confuse thee, and thou shalt use them and discard them whenever thou choosest.
3) Thou shalt recognize that exclamation marks are thy greatest tool.
4) Thou shalt obsess over pairings that would overwhelm lesser minds, for thou art the author, and ultimate authority is thine.
5) Thou shalt include thyself in stories as often as possible, for damn, girl, thou art HOTT!1
6) Thou shalt search unceasingly for names that shall fit thy characters like a second skin, as do their ultra-sexy, fashionable outfits; thy love interest shall be called after the most incredible of names under this sun, even if thou findest it necessary to create one thyself. If all else fail, thou shalt call her: Serena.
7) Thou shalt mix thy favorite stories as if in a divine blender, and choose those parts which thou judgest best, for thy judgment is impeccable.
8) Thou shalt communicate thy thoughts to thy readers at all possible opportunities, thus: (A/N Draco is so hott!!11). Thou shalt worry not about, thou knowest, interrupting story flow or anything.
9) Thou shalt call constructive criticism by its rightful name: that is, a flame. If thou dost receive negative commentary despite thy warnings, thou shalt throw a bitchy fit, and thou shalt act in accordance with thy natural rage, describing to thy enemy the precise shape and girth of the objects thou shalt insert in his anal passage.
10) Thou shalt write from perspectives of different characters, even within a single scene; to indicate switches, or simply to add some spice to your work, thou shalt use extra lines, asterisks, and tildes as much as thou desirest: for example, "*~*Selene'S POV!!!*~*"
Created by bitterpea and marikochan. I applaud them for their awesome work! I made some random additions and I took the suggestions of replies that people made to where I found this.
